I recently came across this post giving 10 Reasons Why Being Single(ish) Rocks.
Renee has really hit the nail on the head with this one – ten times!
From my own experience, there were two key moments that transformed me to a position of really being able to provide honest and open love to a partner:
At Nowhere, I found a group of people so loving, accepting and non-judgmental that I really felt that I had found my home. That environment gave me the opportunity to experience love outside of the constraints of default society. It gave me whole new perspectives on giving and receiving love without the pressure or expectation of coupling off or sex. This experience ticked off points 1 and 10 for me as well as setting me off on the path to points 4 and 5 and solidifying the rest of the points where I was already quite strong on.
- Winding down my OKCupid profile
This was actually a culmination of something that had stirred inside me at Nowhere, something that I realized as I read blogs such as polysingleish and solopoly and something that took root in me as I continued meditation and absorbed the inspiration in Buddhist Boot Camp. The feeling that I myself am enough. I do not need a relationship, never mind multiple to make myself whole. With that, points 4 and 5 were ticked off and I felt a new freedom – letting go of internal attachments to outdated concepts and norms that I had still held for myself.
No sooner had I done that, love started to come to me. The balance that I felt within myself must have radiated out and been noticeable to others… or perhaps it’s just coincidence and I simply started to hang out more in poly-friendly circles such as regional burns and poly conferences… or both.